From Kamala's Personal Papers

1961 - 11/17

 

Meditated deeply late in night until I felt God's joy. Then early, awoke looking into scene in 3rd eye - inner sight. Saw a garden scene illumined with light so bright that on earth I never have beheld any like it. Oh the light - I looked in happy amazement at the lovely scene in living light. I tried to go into the garden (further) and my effort caused the scene to vanish.

1959 - 9/29

 

Awoke with that magic joy I can't describe. First awakening exactly like this in a very long time.

1959 - 7/25

 

July 25 - This Morning after Kriya and watching the sun rise - a great golden ball over Ben Lomond - I opened the A.Y. to these words: 'When your book is finished I shall pay you a visit.' from chap. 36 of 'Babaji's Interest in the West.'

1961 - 7/14

 

Sometime this morning I dreamed of Master - again after so long - We were alone and I was so happy with him. He walked across the room sat in a chair, turned away from me and meditated. I meditated at once in middle of room - I saw and felt joy through what looked like a beautiful fire of tall flames beginning as a fire at the base of my spine and rising to my shoulders - it being of 'light' not 'heat' but could not cause it to become a bonfire for I sensed I was not in spiritual condition to lift it from the cervical into the christ center to merge into it. Afterwards Master again visited with me. Other parts of dreams - including my thinking of what Master would say if he lectured on 'flowers' he has spoken of them so often.

1961 - 7/2

 

Early July: I had restless mental thoughts real early and prayed for Master's help (couldn't feel uplift) - and asked him for 'spiritual company to remind me,' as he said this is our all - important help. Fell asleep and dreamed Sister Mrinalini was sitting in lotus posture on the bare floor at this cottage, and we were talking of the all - day meditation conducted at times by Daya in India - and she said, afterwards - 'I don't need to go to church on Sundays to feel holiness all the time.' I feel her sweet presence now - after waking. Had not thought of her since June, until my dream. I feel the peace I sought - and uplift within.

1960 - 4/29

 

Tonight I prayed to God and Guru to be able to again forget the body in meditation and in a little while my prayer was realized. Oh this means so much to me. I had become incased through so many things and for so long a time.

1960 - 2/21

 

Dream of Master. I woke so glad I had been with him. Others were there - including Daya and Mataji - Master gave me two silver crosses, seemingly for cuff - links in a blouse - similar to cross he gave me on a necklace - but I noted they were real silver and when waking the gift part was not important - but my Guru's presence gave me uplift I have needed - Have so loved the being with him.

1960 - 11/17

 

Meditating today - I affirmed my plan: 'Stop trying to resolve the problems in life. Stop trying to understand the inconsistence in life and the cruelties - especially to animals, but all kinds. Abandon Sankalpa.' Time so spent takes time from God - spends one's energy to no avail. After my above affirnation I felt a tremendous sense of well being.

1960 - 12/7

 

Oh Master - I am savoring the long treasured time with you in dream. So Real. I could feel your presence as well as see and be with you. When you asked me to do something for you , and your dearness, being like whenever with you - but your wishing to be with me! So dear. One of the most precious dreams I've ever had. Accompanying fragrance - of Master, most dear.

1960 - 11/24

 

Thanksgiving. Awoke this morning recalling a clear dream of being with Daya. Sitting in lotus - on floor, with some object in hand we both discussed - spiritual in import - I sensed about her great tranquility - A lightness of being I liked - and thought after waking of her being 'Within a Pool of Tranquility.'